The short answer is Yes.
However, altruism be damned, it makes me feel good to share. I enjoy writing. I enjoy sharing. And I enjoy changing things for the better, especially if it is someone’s life. Keep in mind, when I say someone, I’m referring to all life, but I’ll save that rabbit hole for another post. I’m in the blogosphere because I want to be, because I find it gratifying, and because I enjoy being transparent. Hopefully, someone out there will relate with my content as I continue to produce because at the end of the day I am driven by the potential for Impact.
What do I do?
This changes. A lot. I’m what I refer to as an “escapist” because I’ve partaken in (almost) every activity that would allow me to temporarily escape my physical body. Digest that how you will. I’m addicted to moments and my track record proves I never hang around long.
A vast majority of humans, at least in this country (USA), immediately answer “What do you do?” with their line of work, so here goes…I’ve worked in landscaping, carpentry, construction, delivery, tons of restaurants FOH, gay bars, straight bars, yachts, sales offices, retail, gyms, more sales offices, and a couple more sales offices. Basically, I would research a company, develop presence and mannerisms that I thought a hiring manager at that company would seek out or admire, and then focus on nailing the interview. A percentage would see right through my bullshit, but a good majority did not. My intentions were not ill, but I never planned to stick around. The position funded my interests and activities at the time, which I appreciated. After a short time, I would grow bored, and leave. So what drives me?
My only reason for avoiding suicide. Good or bad, I’m just addicted to living. Not to be confused with loving my “self”. I’ve been severely self deprecating at times…and because my perceived value of my “self” is so low, I had to switch my focus onto making other people’s lives better. I’m most happy when I’m helping others and at those times when I all into selfish waves of behavior, the whispers come back. I used to take any drug in the vicinity all in the name of experience, but that has since evolved into healthy behaviors. I’ve discovered that I get a high from running. From a workout. From speaking in public. And from engaging with someone new. Those moments when you connect with a complete stranger and you begin to peel the layers back as the two of you reveal pieces of your selves, but you’re so zoned in with one another that you completely forget that you’re surrounded by hundreds of other people at some event. Even walking up to a microphone in front of a crowd, no matter the size…it’s as if I leave my body for that period of time. My head is in the clouds.
In my “free time”, I write poetry influenced by hip hop, listen to podcasts, exercise, speak at VegFests, and host events with a 501(c)(3) named Solutionary Events here in St. Petersburg, FL, which I will expand on in another post. I’ve also been attempting to write a book for a couple years now, but my attention span makes that…an interesting endeavor.
How do I do it?
In this circumstance, “It” is the act of trying to stay alive. I try to find ways to make money, legally, so I can pay rent. I don’t own a car because I’m not a fan of car payments and insurance on top of rent, so I ride a bike around town because its good for my health and I enjoy it. I’ve cut all major expenses out other than Rent, a cell phone, and photography school. I don’t “work” often, not because I am lazy, but because I cannot stand to clock-in and stay in one place for hours. I’ve tried to live that way, multiple times, and it never works out. My lack of “work” is not to be confused with being lazy because I do spend a majority of my time trying to find ways to be paid for creating things (through writing and acting) and working with my event director through Solutionary Events. Our sibling-company, if you will, is Solutionary Species, and I hope one day it will be the reason I can pay rent.
The nucleus of anything…the motivator…the purpose. Why do I do the things that I do? I’m going to keep this short and sweet because I’m three days into this post and losing interest 😉
I love new experiences, so my life is ever-changing, and I like having an impact on those around me. Those desires continue to grow as I evolve. I wish I had a more dense answer than just experience and impact, but those are my reasons.
Solutionary Species is where I believe I’ll have the biggest impact. My personal impact on the planet was never more apparent to me until I switched to a whole food, plant-based diet. I know that every single day, with every meal, I have a choice to have an impact on the planet’s well being as well as the lives of human and non-human animals. I’m a Humane Educator and Speaker because I believe it is my duty as a human being to take care of my home. I say “my”, because of my silly ass human ego, but “our” home matters to me, and life itself is why I do what I do. I can only hope this reads as profound as I’d like it to be, but for crying out loud I can’t keep my attention here!
P.S. Watch this. https://youtu.be/l5Tw0PGcyN0